Smart
Sat 8 July 2006

Big Bluffer : The Penultimate Day

by Kedge

I shall relish and cherish this moment. To be asked to adjudicate the penultimate evictees from the Big Bluffer house. An honour indeed! I shall even spell check this report.

So let’s take stock on our remaining presenters.

1. Gary Lineker.
The front man and face (and ears) of the BBC’s football coverage. A national hero, former player, prolific goal scorer (compared to many) and once described as the ultimate goal poacher, (or was it egg boiler?). He also does a lot of work for charity. Currently he is perfecting his own tribute act……… as a Prince of Wales impersonator.

2. Martin O’Neill.
Evidently did play football at school, burst onto the management scene with high flyers Wycombe Wanderers whom he guided from the depths of nowhere to somewhere west of London. Has since been linked with every vacant managers position and indeed has occupied some.

3. Gordon Strachan.
Another former player, spent a lot of this career in the wilderness of the Scottish International side. Was sent to Coventry, for reasons unknown. He has managed almost every team in the land, except the successful ones, and is another whose name is first in the frame when a vacancy occurs.

4. Alan Shearer.
Another footballing hero and national treasure. Despite being a Geordie he is well regarded both by the press and the public. Once unbeatable as part of the SAS (until Chris Sutton sustained a career ending injury and was forced to ply his trade in darkest Glasgow), he made a reputation for himself as another goal poacher, striker extraordinaire, and Olympic freestyle diving champion. Also does a lot for charity and the community.

So! Who is for the chop? One of our heroes? The men that support charity in a big way? The Englishman?, The Irishman? The Scot? Or the Geordie?

I’m sorry, but as a true blue English football lover and a staunch nationalist it has to be Martin and Gordon the singing duo from the sixties.

I’m sure they wouldn’t want to "be in a world without love".

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