Smart
Tue 6 June 2006

The Observers Book of The World Cup

Written by Smart

After watching a wealth of programmes on TV, the stack of DVD's free with cereal packets and potatoes, and after reading all World Cup magazines and guides that you get free with the weekend newspapers (by the way, I dont get out much...) I have made a few observations ...

1. The depth of the goal nets gets deeper with every tournament.
In the days of black and white, the goals were about 3 foot deep and rumours are the nets for Germany 2006 will have been borrowed from the fishing village of Bremenhaven...

2. Goalies used to roll around after conceding a goal.
It took the officials years to find Lee Harvey Oswald amongst the crowd.

3. Bald men score some great goals.
Archie Gemill... Bobby Charlton... Yordan Letchkov...

4. Older kits had baggy shirts and tight shorts.
Most modern kits have tight shirts and baggy shorts.

5. You can see f**k all when they chuck 'ticker-tape' about.
The 1978 World Cup Final was responsible for over 2,000 deaths worldwide. This is because some of the viewing millions fell off the roofs of their homes trying to adjust the TV aerial to remove the 'snow' and interference from picture.

Feel free to add to the list if you have noticed anymore.

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