Super Gran saves the day!

News from the world of science now as we bring you the latest technological breakthrough to make an impact on the sport of Football.

With temperatures dropping to sub-zero levels across the UK this winter, many Premier League grounds have been forced to switch on their under-soil heating prior to many of their games. For the smaller clubs up and down the country, however, it's not always possible to employ such an expensive system to ensure the pitch is cleared of snow. At least not until now, because the efforts of one 78-year-old woman could be about to revolutionise the beautiful game.

Oompah, oompah, stick it up your jumper

Mrs. Elsie Babcock, a retired florist from Doncaster has knitted what's believed to be the world's first 'pitch-pully' - a woolen sweater that fits over an entire playing surface to prevent it from freezing over.

Mrs. Babcock, a Rotherham supporter and Green Party crypto-fascist admits the process of making the oversized garment is time-consuming but worthwhile. "Basically the principles are the same as I'd use for making a jumper for my husband Oswald. I just use a bigger knitting pattern and leave out the sleeves."

Trials

Trials of the Pitch-Pully have been a huge success with several reserve team games at Sheffield United and Doncaster being allowed to take place where a postponement would have almost certainly occurred. Now Babcock's XXXXXXXL pitch cover is about to be used for first team games across the whole of the UK as many clubs show an interest in the product.

And it's here that Babcock's eye for marketing really shows through. While early versions of the giant pullover featured a traditional stripy pattern or Argyle motif, the latest editions now come in the colours of any team you choose with a club badge incorporated into the design.

Plastic fantastic

Elsie Babcock can already rest assured her Pitch-Pully will become an undoubted success with orders coming in by the dozen every day. For now, however, she's turning her attention to producing the successor to her Pitch Pully: it's a giant plastic sheet to go under it for when excessively wet conditions spoil everyone's evening.