Graham
"Trust Sky to stink up the schedule with a complete non-event from Spain."
Preparing to record the Sound Of Football podcast with a quick blast of Zombie Gunship. // TD
8.55pm Monday 6 February
Anyone thinking of setting up a fake Anfield Cat Twitter ID needs to take a long hard look at themselves.
8.16pm Monday 6 February
If you're a fan of our podcast and you roll the Google Plus way then please include us in your circles. https://t.co/Lnhrdzto
10.17am Monday 6 February
Sound Of Football will be recorded tonight. Suggestions for topics for us to ignore are, as always, welcome. //TD
10.14am Monday 6 February
Think you could guess the 12 most successful goalies ever? The answers are on the Friday List... http://t.co/8U46pi7A
4.41pm Friday 3 February
Follow @FutblFairground on Twitter
The Onion Bag: Occasionally humorous football satire

Who owns Johnny Pundit?

OLD BAG: This is an archive story from Issue 205 - 23 Jul 2007
Johnny Pundit

Pundit probe

Carlos Tevez

Tevez 08/09 (artist's impression)

Biscuit

Biscuit: Other snacks are available

Contractual wrangles of a fading wrinkly

Funny old thing, Football. Except it isn't. It's deadly serious. It can even end up owning you, as Carlos Tevez has discovered. As one of Pundit's closest colleagues, I wondered who owned Pundit now.

Aquiver

Fothergill here, Football Correspondent of the Light Programme. Pundit was too depressed by the close season to write anything this week and so, aquiver with journalistic curiosity, I embarked on the football equivalent of one of those popular genealogy programmes to discover: WHO OWNS JOHNNY PUNDIT?

Pundit still at war

Charlie Fessops, an acquaintance of mine in the legal profession, helped me shed some light. In more ways than one, Pundit is like Berwick-upon-Tweed: obscure, confused about who he is and apparently still at war with the Germans. For rumour has it that nobody could decide whether Berwick-upon Tweed was in England or Scotland when war was declared on Germany so it signed its own declaration – which nobody remembered to rescind in 1945. Pundit's life as a commercial entity – Fessops informs me – betrays similar lack of contractual nous; he apparently forgot to give any of the contracts he signed end-dates.

'WIGGO – Great head!'

In short, 15% of him is still owned by Peek Freans (which could explain last week's column – old habits die hard) even though someone else, in turn, now owns Peek Freans; 25% of him is owned by 'WIGGO – The Discreet Hairpiece Company' dating back to a sponsorship deal struck in 1954; and the rest of him is owned by Mickey's Motors in Huddersfield after he sold 50% of himself in exchange for a down payment on his first Hillman Imp, after a rough start to his 1960-61 season left Johnny less enthusiastic about the team coach. Granted, FIFA might not be involved yet – but in Fessops' view, it's only a matter of time.

Respectfully,

Fothergill

Sound Of Football 104: Goalkeepers

MP3 | SUBSCRIBE: RSS / iTunes

Like Sound Of Football on Facebook

Copyright © 2003 - 2012 Football Fairground, Some People Are On The Pitch, The Onion Bag